Back Roads and Far Away Places ~ Volume I
The first installment in an ongoing portfolio documenting the journey on back roads to far away places.
Street Musician ~ Quebec City, Canada
Abandoned Truck Stop ~ Rt. 90 Northeastern Ohio
Waiting For a Train ~ Munich, Germany
Where the Buffalo Roam ~ Taos, New Mexico
Back Alley ~ Penn Yan, New York
Walking Home From School ~ Matsuyama, Shikoku, Japan
STREET ART, GRAFFITI & SIGNS ~ VOLUME III
Volume III in an ongoing series of abstract images made from altered photographs of street art, graffiti and signs.
Shibuya ~ Tokyo, Japan
Self Portrait ~ Shibuya, Tokyo, Japan
Palm Tarot ~ New York City
Television Screen ~ Rock Stream, New York
Arcade ~ Shibuya, Tokyo, Japan
In The Studio ~ Volume III
Volume III in an ongoing series of photographs documenting the work of Daniel Hoffman ~ Luthier ~ Maker Of Fine Concert Violins, Violas, and Violoncellos.
http://www.danielhoffmanluthier.com
Plans and Proportions
Figured Maple
Shaping the Neck
Glued and Clamped
In the Front Room
My Short Story “Bowling For Jesus” is published by Connotation Press in the April 15th edition.
http://www.connotationpress.com/fiction/2279-michael-gillan-maxwell-fiction
From Meg Tuite, Fiction Editor: “The mid-April issue of Connotation Press is up and exceptional! Michelle Messina Reale is our featured fiction writer with three brilliant poetic prose pieces from her upcoming collection. Find out more in our interview. Also we have outstanding work by Michael Gillan Maxwell, Cort Bledsoe, Mike Joyce and Grant Faulkner! Thank you for sending CP some of your beauties!”
I am honored to be in such good company! Thank you Meg Tuite!
Love Is Never Having To Change Your Password
“You’ve got an invalid haircut / And it hurts when you smile / You’d better get out of town / Before your nickname expires” Warren Zevon ~ Life’ll Kill Ya
I’ve been hearing a lot recently about the “Heartbleed” bug, an insidious super cyber thief that invades websites, steals personal security information, passwords, credit card numbers, and other sensitive data. I’ve never changed some of my passwords, ever, since the dawn of time, or at least since my last three computers passed away.
This morning I opened an e mail from a company whose name I did not even recognize informing me that, although they had no reason to believe their security had been breached, they were advising everyone on their client list to change their passwords. I’m on THEIR client list? Who the Hell are these people? This really got my attention since I don’t even recognize their name or remember doing business with them. I have no record of my user name or password with them. However, they remember me, and if THEY have my e mail and other information, I can only assume the situation is far more serious than I even want to know. My cozy little veil of denial dropped away as I realized, that while my slovenly ways in never organizing my sock drawer may never result in any kind of serious consequence, outside of occasionally mismatched socks, THIS could cause some serious grief if left unattended. With a deep sigh of resignation, I decided to go all in and change my user name and passwords for over 32 websites. TODAY. Right now. No more screwing around.
After much pulling of hair, gnashing of teeth and rending and tearing of garments, I completed this odious task. My brain was fried and I was a gibbering idiot, reverting to one finger keyboard pecking and using a cheat sheet. But maybe this is the kind of rigorous mental activity that helps stave off Altzheimers, or causes a complete mental breakdown. Now, If only I could remember my own name….
Many sites have a “password helper” that rates the quality of your password on a spectrum of “strong” to “this really sucks. Why don’t you just advertise it on Facebook?” If you follow their recommendations you’ll create passwords like the rare Enigma machine used by the Nazis to send coded messages. My usernames and passwords are combinations of irrational numbers and Pleadian star language, closely modeled after the nuclear launch codes, and the secret combination that protects the vaults at Fort Knox. The problem is, I’ll never be able to remember any of them. They’re all so counterintuitive that it takes two or three tries for someone blessed with sausage fingers like mine. I feel like I’m already trying to hack myself. This is not good, since many sites freeze your access for at least 24 hours after three bungled attempts.
I’ve already had this error message more than once: “Hey numb nuts! You entered an old password. You changed your password 4 hours ago.”
Old dogs learn new tricks slowly…..
STREET ART, GRAFFITI & SIGNS ~ VOLUME II
Volume II in an ongoing series of images made from altered photographs of street art, graffiti and signs.
PRO BOXING ~ Saratoga Springs, New York
SIDEWALK SPILL ~ New York City
TOW AWAY ZONE ~ Seattle Washington
HAPPINESS & COMPASSION ~ Seneca Falls, New York
STAY TRUE ~ Ithaca, New York
In The Studio: Volume II
Volume II in an ongoing series of photographs documenting the work of Daniel Hoffman ~ Luthier ~ Maker Of Fine Concert Violins, Violas, and Violoncellos. http://www.danielhoffmanluthier.com
Four Cellos
Brush
Varnishing Supplies
Mandolins
In The White
Cello Player
Originally published by Bitchin’ Kitsch December 2013
Short Fuse
He flips through channels, looking for anything worth watching. Someone said a person’s lifespan is shortened by 22 minutes for every hour of television watched. He should have been dead years ago.
Eyes glazed over, he gapes at flickering images, a kaleidoscope of catastrophe; pestilence, economic collapse, religious extremists, suicide bombers, civil war, revolution, record-breaking drought, floods, global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes and a wild fire out of control in Colorado. The bitter taste of bile fizzles in his throat.
He finds a movie about Vikings with flaming torches pitted against ferocious werewolves. The Vikings have Australian accents, the werewolves clearly actors dressed up in ridiculous wolf suits. A commercial advertises a remake of “Towering Inferno.”
Abruptly, he turns it off, jumps in the car and heads for Walmart.
He turns on the radio. Nothing but bad news. He comes up behind a Dodge Caravan with a sign in the window that reads “Baby on Board”. It annoys him. He takes it personally, like anyone without a baby on board is a deranged, meth addled, demolition derby jockey. Is it to remind him to stop driving fast and taking chances? Or to interrupt the text message he must surely be composing? Will it be the tipping point in his decision not to push the pedal to the floor and sideswipe their vehicle, forcing it off the side of the road at 60 miles per hour? He sees the bumper sticker “I brake for unicorns” and his face burns with aggravation. Temples pulsating and hands clammy on the steering wheel, he shifts over to the passing lane, guns the engine and gives the van wide berth.
He stops for gas and wonders what it would feel like to rob a convenience store.
Still contemplating that question, he scans the headlines of the tabloids as he waits to pay. “Dog Accidentally Shoots Man With His Own Gun, Elvis’s Hidden Extraterrestrial Daughter, Swedish Man Bursts Into Flames on Train Platform.”
Dammit! I could make better headlines than that!
His eyelid twitches. The smell of burnt gas station roller dogs is nauseating. Sweating like a stevedore, he pays and gets back in the car.
Walmart is where style goes to die. There’s a man in Sporting Goods with a mullet haircut and a tattoo that says “Do it in the dirt!” He’s seen that guy at the dirt track races. The man’s trying out baseball bats.
His mind a screeching smoke alarm, he realizes what he must do. He grabs a bat and heads over to Electronics, his senses assailed by images on 27 televisions; break dancing, burning buildings, cooking shows, Judge Judy, an oil spill, another school shooting.
He can already picture the headline. “Man Walks into Walmart, Smashes 27 Widescreen Televisions With Baseball Bat.” He likes the way that sounds. The bat feels almost too hot to hold in his hand as he strolls over to a widescreen flickering with the image of a raging fire and starts swinging.
STREET ART, GRAFFITI & SIGNS
An ongoing series of images made from altered photographs of street art, graffiti and signs.
Cross Walk ~ Saratoga Springs New York
Turn Four ~ Black Rock Speedway ~ Dundee, New York
Prosperity ~ Seneca Falls, New York
Zig Zag ~ Seattle, Washington
Your Own Back Yard - Michael Gillan Maxwell 